nightmares?

i had a dream today. i took a nap and i had a dream. i got knocked up by one of my friends from college. but i didn't know i was pregnant? my friend maritza was going around telling all of our friends about how happy she was and how we were gonna have a party, but only 20-30 people. small, by her standards. she runs around with an enthusiasm i obviously don't share. she leaves the apartment to go god knows where and i sit at the kitchen table with my friends anabel and brenda and say "i don't remember taking a test". anabel says something like she remembers. she was with me or maritza was. something along those lines. but i automatically know who the father is, but i don't remember the fun in getting pregnant. so that sucks. anabel starts asking me if i'm gonna finish up school after i have the baby and i start thinking "wait, am i having this baby? i can't get an abortion?" then somehow i think that i'm about 3 months along, not sure if that's too late. then i start holding my stomach like pregnant women do. i start feeling sick. then i wake up.
another baby dream where i don't remember having the kid/getting pregnant.
weird.

dreeeeeeeeeeams.

i had a dream last night, that i moved into an apartment for school.
but i moved in with anabel, a guy i had never met and a bitchy girl i had never met.
the guy was totally into me but nothing happened for the one day (?) i was there.
then i went home for the weekend and one of my friends who is a girl confessed her feelings for me. um. what?
and then the guy showed up at my house to hang out.
and thus my dream ended.

oh! oh!
i also had another dream the other night that i was getting married.
i was getting married in a half hour at disneyland but i was still getting ready at my house.
i don't really remember putting on a white dress or anything like that.
anyway i don't remember the guy i was going to marry except that he was a black guy.
seriously, that's all i remember.
the problem was i kept talking about how i shouldn't go through with it because i'm still in love with taylor (lautner). hahaha, oh dreams. you slay me.

my dreams have become entertaining, like watching and living television while i'm asleep.

Mmmmnap.

I took a nap today, and by nap I mean a four hour sleep. Which is a nap to me. While I was napping I had a dream that I recounted to my friends as soon as I awoke. I dreamt I had a kid. I had a kid that was 5 months old, but in the dream I didn't remember I had had a kid. It was so weird. It was a girl, I picked her up and thought she was beautiful but I put her down and just thought "But I don't want a fucking kid" and kinda wondered why I didn't have an abortion. It was so fucking weird. I didn't even know the kid's name, but it was mine. While it's true that if I somehow became the Virgin Mary I wouldn't want a kid, I wouldn't abort it. I seemed so adamant in my dream on wondering why my past self didn't do it. I DIDN'T REMEMBER HAVING A KID. It was weird, which prompted my friend Rachel to look it up on a dream website she likes and came up with this:

If you dream that you forgot you had a baby, then it suggests that you are trying hide your own vulnerabilities; You do not want to let others know of your weaknesses.

I don't know what to make of it.

Exhibit A

I had a dream last night that I had a boyfriend. I can't recall his face but I don't think he was terribly good looking.

Anyways, in the dream he told me he loved me and all I could say was, get this,

"Really?"

Hahahaha, oh dream self. You're almost as bad as real self.

The moral of the story is, I'm gonna die alone.

Dream a little dream of me...

I had a dream that I was a heavy smoker, and when my Nina saw me with a cigarette she freaked out and said "Whose is that?!" and I blamed it on my Nana but she didn't buy it. Then before I had that dream, I had another dream that my Tata shot me. What up, grandparents? Horrible dreams.