Fun times.

I watched Sweeney Todd and Arrested Development last night with some fun people until 4 in the morning. Sometimes I love my life more than usual.<3

So delicious.

Freebirds nachos and The West Wing after a night of partying? Hell yes.

I'm not ready to move out in two weeks.

I wanna stay here. Can I just stay here?

Mmmmnap.

I took a nap today, and by nap I mean a four hour sleep. Which is a nap to me. While I was napping I had a dream that I recounted to my friends as soon as I awoke. I dreamt I had a kid. I had a kid that was 5 months old, but in the dream I didn't remember I had had a kid. It was so weird. It was a girl, I picked her up and thought she was beautiful but I put her down and just thought "But I don't want a fucking kid" and kinda wondered why I didn't have an abortion. It was so fucking weird. I didn't even know the kid's name, but it was mine. While it's true that if I somehow became the Virgin Mary I wouldn't want a kid, I wouldn't abort it. I seemed so adamant in my dream on wondering why my past self didn't do it. I DIDN'T REMEMBER HAVING A KID. It was weird, which prompted my friend Rachel to look it up on a dream website she likes and came up with this:

If you dream that you forgot you had a baby, then it suggests that you are trying hide your own vulnerabilities; You do not want to let others know of your weaknesses.

I don't know what to make of it.

I can't wait for summer reading...

1. Uglies-Scott Westerfeld
2. Pretties-Scott Westerfeld
3. Specials-Scott Westerfeld
4. Go Ask Alice-Anonymous
5. Girl at Sea-Maureen Johnson
6. The Perks of Being A Wallflower-Stephen Chbosky
7. Extras-Scott Westerfeld
8. Crank-Ellen Hopkins
9. The Bermudez Triangle-Maureen Johnson
10. Angus, Thongs, and Full-Frontal Snogging-Louise Rennison
11. The Key to the Golden Firebird-Maureen Johnson
12. Glass-Ellen Hopkins
13. Suite Scarlett-Maureen Johnson
14. The Book Thief-Markus Zusak
15. The Last Time I Wore A Dress: A Memoir-Daphne Scholinski
16. Youth in Revolt-C.D. Payne
17. Devilish-Maureen Johnson
18. Me Talk Pretty One Day-David Sedaris
19. On the Bright Side I'm Now the Girlfriend of a Sex God-Louise Rennison
20. The Nanny Diaries-Emma McLaughlin and Nicola Kraus

I hate this.

Dear California,
Way to let me down. This is the second time I've been deeply ashamed to call myself a Californian in the past year.
Ashamed,
Nicole

I'm home from San Fran,

AND READY TO REPEAL PROP 8 TOMORROW, HELL YEAH.

I went to ripley's believe it or not today. you know what? I believe it.

on my way to San fran. do did do. I'm doing this on my iphone. do do do.

Is it the weekend yet?

I'm going to San Fran this weekend, I'm really excited. Also, pulling all-nighters leave me um, delusional. Far too much.

I HATE SCHOOL.

I HAVEN'T SLEPT ALL NIGHT KILL ME.

This needed to be cross-posted.

Dear Robert Downey Jr.,

I wanna say something. I'm gonna put it out there; if you like it, you can take it, if you don't, send it right back. I want to be on you.

Love,

Nicole

Why?

I just created a tumblr. I honestly don't know why I did either.

Shit.

This weekend has been so exhausting. And now I have to write two papers adding up to 16 pages, one homework assignment, and a short prompt about 300 words? Kill me now.

I love SNL.

We're watching the shorts right now. OH GOD, SO FUNNY.

Oh dear God.

I just finished Relay and I'm EXHAUSTED. Too bad I can't sleep and I'm going to brunch and then Extravaganza to see Cold War Kids and Girltalk yeeeeeeeeeah!

I'm doing Relay for Life later today!

Plz to be donating monies?
(Unless you're Shey, who is just awesome.)

http://main.acsevents.org/goto/nicoleface

Thursdays.

Yesterday I thought it was Thursday. In my mind Thursday=The Office. You can imagine I was thoroughly upset to realize it was only Wednesday.

BUT GUESS WHAT?
THIS STORY HAS A TWIST AND A HAPPY ENDING.

TODAY IS THURSDAY YAAAAAAY.

The dream story.

About a week or two ago I was having a conversation with two of my friends where one of them was telling me about a dream they had. As she was telling me about her dream I realized that whenever these girls tell me about the dreams they have, they are, dare I say it, happy dreams. They are dreams where the girls get everything they've been wanting lately. Started crushing on a boy lately? Hook up with him in a dream. Been wanting to go to Disneyland? Ride Space Mountain in your dreams.

So I interrupted this dream telling and said "WAIT. Do you guys have dreams where you get EVERYTHING you want?" I asked this very incredulously. I had never heard of people having dreams where they get everything they want, or if I did I chose to ignore them because it saddens me. Then they answered "Well, yeah." I was kinda surprised. I mean, I thought that's what daydreams are for. You have control over those. I always get what I want in daydreams, but in real dreams? Never. I told them "You don't have dreams where you kinda get what you want, but it's half-assed and something always screws it up?" And they're like "Uh...no." I thought it over to myself and I was like, is it just me? Am I that screwed up? So I said out loud, not thinking, "Oh, it's probably cos I'm self-destructive. I even fuck up my dreams." They kinda laughed at me at my semi-serious remark. I don't think they really understood what I meant. I think they associate self-destruction with space movies. Like, when you press the wrong button on a space craft and a soothing female voice tells you "Spacecraft will self destruct in 5...4..." (Seriously, why would you have that button?!)

The truth is, I had never had a dream where I got what I want. I remember when I was severely obsessed with Edward Cullen I finally had a dream about him months later and all I got to do was watch him make out with Bella. Even my dream self was like "REALLY? It's MY dream and I have to watch him make out with BELLA?!" It was actually pretty sad.

So last Friday I was at home listening to Death Cab at 2 in the morning. Let's just say that listening to Death Cab alone in the dead of night isn't the most motivating thing to do. I somewhat fell into a slump and might have cried a little. (I mean, have you seen the animated video for "Grapevine Fires"?! It's DEPRESSING) So I went to sleep and...I dreamt that I got what I wanted. I got it and I kept quiet the entire time because even dream self knew that if I talked I would fuck it up. (Dream self took a note from real self. DON'T BE SELF DESTRUCTIVE IN DREAMS) I got what I wanted and it was sweet. Also, it was PG. I know where your pervy minds are going.

Then I realized why I should be self destructive in dreams. It hurt too much when I woke up.

Yay vacation!

I am going to San Francisco for Memorial Day Weekend.
What?
Yay!
I chose San Fran over Vegas even though I've been having cravings for Vegas like a crackhead.

Wheeeeeeee!

I got an A on my Feminist Studies midterm!! Yaaaaaaaay!

Happy Mother's Day!

I wish I could spend more time with my mom today. But I have to go back to SB and the fire. Wah.

Reminder to self:

Blog later about the dream I had last night.

I want to evacuate.

NOW.

There's smoke coming in through my windows and hurting my eyes.
There's ash floating everywhere outside.
The moon is red.

This is all wrong.

Life is good.

I'm eating a Freebirds burrito. FUCK YEAH.

Um.

The fire is huge. I thought there were huge clouds over the ocean when I looked out my window. That's the fire.


Shit.

Burritooooooooo.

I really want a burrito.
Somebody make that happen.

Oh and happy fake holiday where we supposedly got our independence from Spain. Cheers. We all know this is so Americans (aka UCSB) can get drunk in our honour.

I feel summer creeping up on me.

You know how I know?

I've been playing my Wii far too much for the past two days.
Oh Animal Crossing and Super Mario 64, you will kill me this quarter.

Exhibit A

I had a dream last night that I had a boyfriend. I can't recall his face but I don't think he was terribly good looking.

Anyways, in the dream he told me he loved me and all I could say was, get this,

"Really?"

Hahahaha, oh dream self. You're almost as bad as real self.

The moral of the story is, I'm gonna die alone.

It's already May?!

When did that happen?!

That's pretty ridiculous. I can't believe I move out in a little over a month. GAH. That's just, wow.

I need to read more.

1. Uglies-Scott Westerfeld
2. Pretties-Scott Westerfeld
3. Specials-Scott Westerfeld
4. Go Ask Alice-Anonymous
5. Girl at Sea-Maureen Johnson
6. The Perks of Being A Wallflower-Stephen Chbosky
7. Extras-Scott Westerfeld
8. Crank-Ellen Hopkins
9. The Bermudez Triangle-Maureen Johnson
10. Angus, Thongs, and Full-Frontal Snogging-Louise Rennison
11. The Key to the Golden Firebird-Maureen Johnson
12. Glass-Ellen Hopkins
13. Suite Scarlett-Maureen Johnson
14. The Book Thief-Markus Zusak
15. The Last Time I Wore A Dress: A Memoir-Daphne Scholinski
16. Youth in Revolt-C.D. Payne
17. Devilish-Maureen Johnson
18. Me Talk Pretty One Day-David Sedaris
19. On the Bright Side I'm Now the Girlfriend of a Sex God-Louise Rennison